PHOENIX TRAMPOLINE CLUB (TELFORD)

Dear diary, today I was to embark on a mission that, in spite of it being Friday 13th, should prove to be as simple a task as the charge of the light brigade. With an abundance of confidence I set out to master the art of populating the magnificent feat of engineering AKA the Phoenix Trampoline Club notice board (thank you Stuart for the donation). I arrived at the school just in time to be met by the herd of missing links that rushed at me as though they were in the Next sale, however with the determination of a lemming I managed to lock myself in the entrance hall where I was to perform the transformation of the board.  Against my better judgement I had bought with me a sharp instrument, namely a pair of scissors, I am not usually allowed sharp instruments on account of me once cutting my thumb bad enough to warrant stitches and then on my return from hospital hitting it with a mallet breaking it in two places (thumb not the mallet), however, here I was poised for action when a couple of teachers in the form of Dave Shorrock and Neil Gregory materialised in what can only be described as a doctor who entrance. Startled, I was then to understand why I was forbidden scissors. The slicing of my thumb, which was now bleeding for Europe, was a further embarrassment as I had covered the Phoenix TC health and safety poster in the finest Nigel claret. With the prowess of bob the builder I had removed the Perspex cover which became an innate object form of Lucifer possessing a will of its own (ever tried hanging jelly). With a removed cover, all the posters nicely lined up what could go wrong? The obvious answer is that on sliding the cover back across the board all the posters decided to migrate to the left. With steadfast optimism I repeated the practice until the Perspex was safely mounted and at least some of the posters survived the ordeal. Just pop the two screws back in…. Yeah right! The easy accessed screw is always the one that’s OK, it’s that demon screw at the top which requires an engineering degree. Sorry Stuart I may have knackered the thread.